Bubala, Mumi & Max

Tuesday, July 25, 2006

Bikers Are So Damn Hot!

Not Hot!
No, no, no! Not that kind of biker!

Here's the kind of bikers that I'm talking about:

I have been hiking a little later in the day than usual. I had been going out in the early afternoon, but for the past few days, it's been more like early evening. This is turning out to be a very good thing since it seems that early evening is when all the hot biker men are out on the trails. There is something about a guy on a bike in the woods that does it for me every time. Watching them pump those pedals with their huge, muscular calves. All that heavy breathing, tires spinning, mud flying. Excuse me for just a moment while I touch myself...

Now biker guys, heed my advice. Shirtless is definitely the best way to do the trail biking thing. That bright yellow and red spandex racing shirt that some of you wear does not make me think that you are a professional biker in the middle of a big race or anything like that. In fact, it looks more like some sort of biker clown outfit to me. All that's missing is the big red nose and the floppy oversized shoes. So, ditch the loud racing shirts. They're just going to get all muddy anyway. Naked, muddy skin is just fine with me. Makes me think of how much fun it would be to hop into the shower with you, soap you up and then we can both get a little dirty while we get cleaned up. (Yeah, I'm touching myself again... so what!)

While we're on the subject of clothes. Whereas spandex biker shorts can certainly be very stimulating to stare at, I much prefer staring at those men who are wearing khaki shorts, cargo shorts or any other cotton shorts. Just a personal preference, I'm sure. It just makes you look more rugged and manly to me.

Speaking of looking at men. It's no big secret guys. I know that you all are checking me out as you roll past me on your bikes. I see you doing it. You're so obvious! So, here's the answer to the question that you are begging with your eyes to be answered. No, I do not wear underwear under my flimsy athletic shorts. Yes, you can see my dingle dangling if you look really close. Feel free to check out my junk all you want. I don't mind at all. In fact, I like it when you look. And, you can be sure that I will be checking out your junk as well. Fair is fair!

I'll Be Watching Out For You
Oh yeah guys, just remember one thing. I'm a grower, not a shower. So, all you size queens out there, don't be too worried. He might be a little a shy at first, but once my little buddy gets to know you a little better, you won't be disappointed. If any of you hot bikers wants proof, let's just step off of the trail and head into the woods for a bit. You'll see.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

I just found your blog. I love the dumb thing, having done quite a few myself. I grew up in Glen Burnie and was in the cub scouts. Could we know each other from a former life?

8:31 PM  

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