Bubala, Mumi & Max

Friday, March 10, 2006

Moanin' And Groanin' (Not The Fun Kind...)

On The Rag
So, every time I get in a line at the supermarket or a department store or Target or wherever, the same thing happens. The line that I am in stops moving. It doesn't just slow down a little, it stops. There is no way for me to avoid this problem. It is pretty much guaranteed to happen.

Case and point, last night, Giant Food. I stop in for a few things hoping to get in and out real quick. All I need is some Pepsi, a couple of apples, trash bags and some strawberry preserves. I find all the stuff on my list right away and get up to the front of the store to get in line. Most of the lines are three or four people deep and each person has at least half a cart load of stuff. I spot a line with just one lady in it and she only has a few things on the belt. I figure my line luck might just be about to change, and I hop into that line.

Well, wouldn't you know it. No sooner do I get in line, and I hear the lady in front of me say those dreaded words, "Oh no, that's not how much that is supposed to cost."

Damn it, damn it damn it!

Turns out that she is trying to buy two boxes of tampons that she claims are on sale two for $5, but they are ringing up at $5 each. So, of course, the cashier has to do a price check. I can't believe what happens next as the cashier yells across the crowded store, "Hey Bob! I need a price check on these extra large tampons!" I'm not shitting you, this is exactly the way it happened. So, Bob goes off and checks the price and then yells back across the store to the cashier, "The extra large tampons are $5 each. The smaller tampons are on sale two for $5!"

By this time, you would think that the lady buying the tampons would be mortified and that she'd just want to get her tampons no matter how much they cost and run out of the store and never look back! But, this is Glen Burnie, so she's not mortified. In fact, she seems completely unfazed and she hollers back to Bob, "Well, if the extra large tampons aren't on sale two for $5, then why are they on the same rack with the smaller tampons and a sign that says two for $5?" Of course, Bob doesn't have an answer to that.

By now, I'm thinking to myself, "Okay, we have a large lady here trying to buy extra large tampons, so it's most likely her time of the month. Let's not mess with her and aggravate her any more than we have to, please. Just give her the extra large tampons two for $5 so no one gets hurt, and I can out of here and get home, please!"

So, Bob, the cashier and the large lady bicker back and forth for a couple of minutes before the store manager finally comes over to help out. He ultimately sides with the large lady. Probably because he is afraid he'll get the crap kicked out of him by a large PMS'ing woman if he doesn't. He lets the lady have the extra large tampons two for $5. Thank goodness!

So, let this be a lesson to all you guys out there. If you see me standing in line in a store somewhere, please come on over and say hi. Just make sure that you do not get in line behind me.

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