Bubala, Mumi & Max

Tuesday, February 21, 2006

Hope They Don't Revoke My Membership Card

I am not so sure that I am so good at being a homosexual.

Hank is dreamy...

I mean, I love cock and all. And, hairy men still get me rock hard. Still, I'm just not convinced that I am being the best homosexual that I can be.

Let's see... Here are some things that I don't like:
  • Broadway Musicals
  • Drag Shows
  • Dressing Up Like A Lady
  • Shaving Any Part Of My Body
  • Guys With Any Part Of Their Body Shaved
  • Barbara Streisand
  • Clubbing
  • Dressing Up In Leather (Although some guys do look good in leather...)
  • Ecstasy
  • Mariah Carey
  • Olympic Figure Skating
  • Will & Grace
  • Pierced Nipples
  • Mini Coopers
  • Judy Garland
  • Cirque du Soleil
  • The Wizard Of Oz
  • Prince Alberts (I'm really on the fence on this one. I mean, it is in a cock after all, and I do love those.)
  • Disney (Well, I do like some Disney theme parks, but those sappy cartoons, ugh!)
  • Wearing Feathers Or Wings Or Glitter On Any Part Of My Body
  • Using The Word "Fabulous"
  • Screaming Banshee Dance Music
  • Anal Sex
  • Zima

My house isn't all done up with the latest furnishings from Ikea or Restoration Hardware. I don't care about how much money you make. I drive a pick up truck. Most of my clothes come from Target. My shoes cost less than a nice dinner for four at Boston Market. I don't know how to match wallpaper with sofa coverings. I wear Fruit Of The Looms. I don't eat at any restaurant that I cannot pronounce. Sweats and a T-shirt are formal wear at my house. My dog is a mutt. I only own three pairs of shoes. I don't live in the city. Most of my socks are white. I believe that dress shoes are for weddings, funerals and job interviews only. I don't know which fork is the dessert fork. I don't know how to exfoliate.

Oh, there is just so much more. Too much to mention, in fact. I just really do not think that I am a very good homosexual. Anyone know of any 12 step programs out there for guys like me?

Dancing Queen

On the bright side, I do love Abba. I am a roller coaster nut. And, I think that Jake Gyllenhaal is totally hot. So, there is hope for me yet!

2 Comments:

Blogger TOS said...

The 2nd to last part is a biggie - well it would be to me at least ;-) But it doesn't make you any less of a homo - unless of course you are some right wing conservative... in which case well, exorcisms may be indicated as a 12 step wouldn't be enough for that! ;-)

4:31 PM  
Blogger Bubala said...

No! Heavens no! I am no conservative! Ugh, what an icky thought! :)

1:48 PM  

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