A Whole Lotta' Ass Goin' On
WARNING: Extremely cruel and insensitive rant about large posteriors directly ahead.
Proceed at your own risk.
Everywhere I go these days, I get stuck behind a big fat ass. No, I'm not referring to assholes, although, there are plenty of those around here also. What I am referring to is big, huge, fatty fatten-stuff asses. Like the one pictured above.
I can't get down an aisle in Wal-Mart without getting stuck behind a large behind. I can't get through the grocery store with out being trapped behind a big ol' butt waddling slowly down the cookie aisle, while gazing lustfully and ever so longingly at every shelf. I can't even seem to walk down the sidewalk anymore without being trapped behind a wide, heavy load. I'm really starting to get tired of it.
Just how does one's ass get that big in the first place? I would kill myself long before I let my ass get that out of control. Sure, some of you will scream, "Genetics! It's not my fauult. It's genetic!" Sorry, I ain't buying that. You see, I have been fat before myself. Yes, I had a big, flabby ass once. I got disgusted by it though and stopped eating so many Little Debbies and Cinnabons and started exercising. Now, miraculously, my ass is a whole lot smaller than it used to be. Truly amazing how that works.
Proceed at your own risk.
Everywhere I go these days, I get stuck behind a big fat ass. No, I'm not referring to assholes, although, there are plenty of those around here also. What I am referring to is big, huge, fatty fatten-stuff asses. Like the one pictured above.
I can't get down an aisle in Wal-Mart without getting stuck behind a large behind. I can't get through the grocery store with out being trapped behind a big ol' butt waddling slowly down the cookie aisle, while gazing lustfully and ever so longingly at every shelf. I can't even seem to walk down the sidewalk anymore without being trapped behind a wide, heavy load. I'm really starting to get tired of it.
Just how does one's ass get that big in the first place? I would kill myself long before I let my ass get that out of control. Sure, some of you will scream, "Genetics! It's not my fauult. It's genetic!" Sorry, I ain't buying that. You see, I have been fat before myself. Yes, I had a big, flabby ass once. I got disgusted by it though and stopped eating so many Little Debbies and Cinnabons and started exercising. Now, miraculously, my ass is a whole lot smaller than it used to be. Truly amazing how that works.
posted by Unknown at 3:56 PM
5 Comments:
If you need both doors in an office building opened for you, it may be time to consider why they don't make jeans in that ass size.
Those asses are why I prefer not to leave the city, as the rest of the country is drowning in asses beyond bounds.
I know what your problem is: Walmart! Come shopping in NYC, where the aisles are too narrow to accommodate fat people (and usually skinny ones too).
I know you didn't just bad-mouth Little Debbie!
Jeezus! Did you photomanipulate that picture!?
How would even begin to rim that?
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