Malegram For Mongo

This blog entry is posted here so as not to soil The Kingdom of the Bald Monkey’s peaceful domain with it’s content. (What a scary fucking picture!) Bubala and I aren’t much into the leather thing. We probably could pull it off if we were younger (or, is that older?) and I didn’t feel like and look like a completely, pathetic dork just getting back from a shopping trip at The Nostalgia Factory.

The whole dress up thing is not our scene at all. Just like collecting lots of sexual partners isn’t our cup of tea either. It all just seems like there is too much work involved. It’s the weekend, and I’m relaxing!

That is, until our friend Donn called to see if we were going to be heading downtown for any of the MAL events. I told him that we really hadn’t talked about it. Bubala was off from work on Saturday, so we may head downtown, but we really aren’t into the leather thing and we always feel completely alienated just hanging out with a bunch of leather guys with us just standing there in our t-shirts and sneakers. Donn told me that there are plenty of guys there in their jeans just hanging out, so we should think about it. I told him we may show up at Jimbo’s pre-BlowOff gathering and maybe at BlowOff. (to make requests for music with REAL DRUMMERS!) but that would most likely be the extent of it. (And no, I will not be dressed anything like that complete idiot in that picture!)

Donn was so sweet though, reassuring me and telling me that we really should head downtown and get lucky have some fun. He worries that Bubala and I don’t get it on with other hot fuckers enough have enough extra-curricular activities. Whether or not we make it downtown to prowl around on the hunt for hot men remains to be seen though.

I do hope that everyone has a safe and happy time at MAL though. And, if you see this guy pissing on anyone, please take pics and send them to me. That would be fuckin’ hot to look at for a wank or two.

I leave you now with my pathetically, shaming, dorko picture (suck it in dude!) for you to pick apart and criticize my pale, underdeveloped winter body in your comments to Bubala. Just don’t make him cry, or I’m kickin’ ass!

Oh yeah, and here are some new MAL acronyms I thought up just for you. Enjoy!

MAL Acronyms:

Most Attention Lovers - For those who go just to be looked at.
Muscle Attitude Language - For those that are too dumb to make conversation.
Macho Arrogant Losers - For those that are too good for it all.
Mostly Antique Leftovers - For those in gropes I mean groups.
Middle Aged Loners - For those that are there by themselves.
Men Alcohol Lube - For those who enjoy the combination.
Mr. Ass Licker - For that special slutty someone in your life.
Mario And Luigi - For those hung like a Donkey Kong.
Mutilated Animal Lingerie - For what you will be wearing.
More Acronyms Later - For when I think of more or when you do.