Bubala, Mumi & Max

Tuesday, June 27, 2006


This is our 100th blog posting!
Pretty boring 100th post, eh?
Here's a pic to help spice it up a little bit...


Thursday, June 22, 2006

A Little Too Much Exposure

I love the summer months. I love the heat. I love the humidity. I love to get outside in the sweltering heat, and I love to sweat. I feel like that when I sweat, all of the toxins are released from my body and, as a result, I feel refreshed and renewed. It makes me feel very alive.

I love to hike. I love to find a secluded trail somewhere out in the woods away from it all and just walk and think and take in all the nature. It is very peaceful and very beautiful.

I love to be naked. I love to feel the summer breeze all over my body. It feels especially good if it is hot enough outside that I am sweating. The breeze lifting the moisture away from my naked skin is just so refreshing. It is not a sexual thing. It is not an exhibitionistic thing. I just love being out in nature free of the restraints of clothing. Free of everything, really. It is a very liberating thing to do. A totally mood enhancing experience.

Leave my leaf alone!
Anyone want to go hiking some time?

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

Mischievous Max's Medical Mishap

Keeps me in stitches!
On Monday I got my bandage off from my surgery last Thursday. Dr. Lee said everything looked great. So, we got home and I was looking at my leg and I went to sniff it and these sharp little thorn things pricked me on the nose. Well, I didn't like that too much. So, I ran all around the house trying to get away from the thorns in my leg. On top of all that, there was this weird smell on my leg and it itched like a bitch, so I started to lick it. Only when I did lick it, I would get pricked in the nose. Mumi and Bubala didn't seem too sympathetic about the whole situation. All they did was yell at me and tell me NO! So, after a while I just pretended that it didn't bother me and except for a few times when they caught me licking my leg and threatened to put that space collar thingy on me, I think I had them fooled that I was being a good dog and that I was going to leave my leg alone. They even gave me ice cream to take my mind off things and that worked until I finished eating it that is.

Well, I waited until just the right moment, when no one was paying attention to me, to make my move. You see, I had been checking out the thorns in my leg and licking them and I discovered that if I got them wet enough, then they really didn't prickle too much anymore. In fact, if I discovered that if I chewed them a little I could even get one loose and it just pulled right out!


Oh shit! Mumi caught me. They put the space collar on me, and that made me feel like a dork. They were just laughing at me, and I just sat there looking sad and afraid to move.

Bitches!Then, they ended up taking me back to that place where I got my operation, and none of us were too happy about it. I got a staple where the thorn that I chewed out used to be. And, I also got a brand new yellow bandage and lots of attention too. All the excitement made me really tired, so as I was drifting off to sleep, I was plotting my revenge.

This weekend, when Bubala and Mumi go away to Nearfest and Uncle Robby stays with me, we can have a babe fest because Uncle Rob is straight and single. I'll have three or four of them bitches pawing at me and pampering me because I have a hurt leg. I intend to use it to my full advantage. Those bitches will be giving me more than a little back scratching and rubbing under the chin if you know what I mean.


Tuesday, June 20, 2006

Pride, Hon!

Pride, hon!
This past weekend started with me sending my clone to Titan on Friday night as by requested by my buddy Greg, The Bowie Bub. I'm not sure if my clone made it to the bar though. He came home late, completely trashed and said that he had a good time under the pool table. I, on the other hand, stayed home to look after my little boy Max and my big boy Bubala.

Pride Day #1

Saturday morning was spent doing last minute workouts and shopping for Father's day presents. We had already decided to take the light rail up into Baltimore. There is a stop just a couple of blocks away from home, and by taking the train, we could avoid the city parking hassles. So, we get on the train and a few stops later, this guy gets on with a cell phone. He's talking really loudly, and as I listen to his "mother fucking this and that" and as I watch him talking into the phone, slowly I realize that there is no one on the other end of the line. He's talking to and answering himself. I was able to catch scraps of the conversation from my end, and he did a real good job of answering imaginary questions from the non-existent other end of the phone line. Mostly, he was talking about Glenn Jones, and he was singing some part of some song all while yelling into all the different parts of the phone and banging the phone against things like the windows and the seats. I could understand him saying things like "Yeah, I told you that the cop said don't worry about that damn ni***r, he ain't talkin' to no one." Then, there was the story about the time that he saw this girl on a bus and she pulled a knife on him. So, he pulled his knife out and they went at it. And, there was his comment about having a little woo woo before leaving and how he was getting off at the Camden Yards stop. Now, keep in mind that Baltimore has a pretty big heroin problem. So, after awhile, I realized what I was seeing was just our local form of drug induced surrealism played out as a public performance art piece for our traveling entertainment. After he got off the train at the Lexington Market stop, the rest of the passengers and I had a good laugh.

We made it to our stop in one piece and walked the couple of blocks from the light rail stop to the Pride events. Last year, our surprise guest for pride was Bubala's mother, my mother in-law. Oh, you should be so lucky. This year, not only did we have Mom, but we also had Bubala's sister, Anne and his nephew, Baby Braeden along as well. I'm just sorry that they got there a little earlier than us and missed the pre-parade entertainment on the light rail train.

The parade started and Mom and Anne collected all the candy and beads and goodies being tossed from the floats and cars so that we didn't have to. They kept saying that it was all for the baby, but, it was really all for us. They even got Max a blue rubber ball from the Pretentious Pooch float. My in-laws both wore matching rubber rainbow shoes, so I think that everyone just thought, "Oh, what a cute little Lesbian couple with their baby." I, on the other hand, knew that they was just sneaky straight people dressing up like gays and coming to the parade to get all the Pride candy and beads for themselves. So, after the parade, I was over it and ready to get away from them, take my shirt off, grab my husband's hand and enjoy the rest of the day being gay.
We ran into so many people that we know. Some of whom we hadn't seen in quite some time and others we see here and there and everywhere. We finally met some of our online buds in person which is always nice. We hooked up with our buddy Greg, and he hung with us for most of the day and evening. He was over at this private bear house party happening on one of the side streets. We went over to this party after a while and ran into the always very friendly Carl from D.C. Bubala tried to sneak us into the bear party house based on Carl's suggestion that since we knew a lot of the guys around, we would fit right in. So, this fuckin' hottie watching front the door puts a wristband on Bubala and then he says to me, "You know, we usually we make the guys whip it out before they can come in." So I say, "Oh, well, that's Ok I'll just wait outside then." He told me that he was just kidding and handed me a wrist band, but I wasn't too interested in going inside. Besides, there was plenty to look at outside. So, Bubala went in and found Greg, and we took off back to the block party.

Larry, Moe & Curly
I drank alcohol for the first time since last December when Tim, Donn, Jason and I went to the Green Lantern one Thursday night for Shirtless Men Drink Free, and I got trashedsickasadog. This time I was drinking strawberry daiquiris. They were sweet and fruity and summery, and I had a good time. We ran into some other friends of ours, Ron and Larry along with a few of their friends and decided to wait with them for Tiffany. We had a special way of keeping track of the time with the help of Greg and the moon. The time passed quickly enough, and soon Tiffany was on stage. I had this plan that if I could get close enough, I could throw rocks at her. Only, after Bubala and I got close enough to take a few pics we realized that someone else must have already pelted her with rocks. I guess Baltimore is just a quick stop away from her vacation trailer in Ocean City. She sure looked like she should be pushing a baby stroller down the boardwalk with an ice cream cone in her right hand and a huge cup of Thrashes French fries in her left hand. I saw drag queens in the parade that looked better than she did. (I'm such a mean bastard sometimes, but the truth has very sharp claws.)

What A Drag!
Oh yeah, my favorite quote of the day on Saturday came from one of our more interesting friends, TJ (No, not the Durban Bud!) When the subject of going camping came up, he said "When I go camping, I just go to be a whore."

Pride Day # 2

Anyway, so the next day was a "try to fit it all in" sort of day. First, it was down to Annapolis to see my family for Father's Day brunch. Then, we headed up to Baltimore again to Druid Hill Park for day #2 of Baltimore Pride. We got there late and the parking lot we usually park in was filled. We realized that this event had grown in population since last year, a reflection of Baltimore's growing gay community. It was hotter then hell and, being a bald guy, I just turned into a waterfall of sweat.

I noticed a lot of different churches out in force pimping their places of worship using whatever means possible to try to draw us in. One booth had this really scary guy with a hand puppet on that looked like a blue Ernie from Sesame Street. The puppet was saying, "do you want free cookies and free lemonade?" and pointing to their booth where all the scary church people were waiting to hand you pamphlets. It totally seemed like a child molestation moment just waiting to happen. Someone handed me a fortune cookie at one of the booths with no fortune inside, just a scrap of paper saying United Methodist Church. Confucius say that is a rip off! I didn't eat the cookie.

We saw some of the same folks as the previous day plus we had the pleasure of meeting up with my favorite park ranger, Adam. When we first moved to Glen Burnie, I would go for walks or ride my bike or walk the dog on the B&A Trail and I would see this park ranger who is REALLY cute and very friendly to me. I always wondered about him until a few years ago when I saw him at Pride. He has since changed job locations so I don't see him that often anymore so it was great to see him at Pride.

We walked around the festival a few times and checked out all of the booths. We even sat down on the lawn and listened to a couple of the bands perform a few songs. But, the heat was just too intense and, even after sitting in the shade and drinking a cool, non-alcoholic drink, I was still too hot to want to hang out for too long. So, we went home, cranked up the air conditioning, got naked and did it. Just like any other good and proud monkeys would do.

Monday, June 19, 2006

A Very Pride Weekend

What a great weekend! We had a fantastic time at Pride this weekend. I'll post all the details and some funny stories later. In the meantime, I hope that you will enjoy this pic of Freddie Ljungberg as much as I do.


Saturday, June 17, 2006

In The Name Of Love...

Baltimore Pride is this weekend. We'll be there. Will you? If so, make sure that you say hi.

Friday, June 16, 2006

Recovering Nicely

Max From Mars
Max got through his surgery without complications. When we went to pick him up from the vet last night, he was a little out of it from the anesthesia, but he was thrilled to see us in a doped up doggy sort of way. I know that he is glad to be coming home.

Yeah, he absolutely hates having that cone on his head, but I think that we may have to make him wear it when we go out and leave him home alone. I just don't want to take the chance that he'll chew off the bandage and rip out the stitches in his leg. Don't worry, we'll only humiliate him when no one else is around to see, when we go out.

By the way, is it obvious that we have a gay vet? I just love the pink bandage!

Here is a pic of the offending tumor. Gross, huh?


Thursday, June 15, 2006

It's Not A Too-mah!

Max has squeaky cheeks!
Sorry for the lack of posts lately. Just a lot going on here.

This morning, we dropped Max off at the vet for a surgery to remove a tumor from his leg. Max hates the vet. Even though he is mostly blind, he still knows the way to the vet's office. As soon as we get on the road and headed that way, he starts whimpering. Poor little guy. He looked so nervous as we put him into the cage at the vet's office and said our goodbyes. We are sure that he will be fine. It's just a a simple (but expensive... damn, I should have been a vet!) surgery. We'll have him back at home later today. Of course, we will still worry all day.

Tuesday, June 06, 2006

666 - The Day Of The Beast: A Survival Guide

Hail SatanWell, it's here. One of only a few days that the Bible never really warned you sufficiently about. Yes, this is one of the few days in history when the gates of Hell will be opened up just a crack. Enough so that some of Satan's demons can get out and run around on the Earth and eat some yummy Christian souls. Long timers, newly converted, whatever. If your personal savior is Jesus Christ, then you just may get your soul eaten by a little demonic creature today. You might be taking a nap, just a quick one after work, and an incubus could stick his long devil dick into your tight little Christian pucker hole and blow his demon seed all over your virgin soul, rendering it useless for the purpose of getting into Heaven.

You can try suicide in an attempt to escape this evil plague, but then again, suicidal souls aren't really getting into that exclusive country club in the sky either. Your best bet is to listen to me. Now, Christians aren't really my favorite kind of people in the world. Under the circumstances, however, I will rise above the situation and use my vast knowledge of demonic behavior to try and save some of you.

The idea is to try to fool the demons and make them believe that you are on their side. Just be like one of them for the day. When picking out your wardrobe for the day, remember that you should only wear black and red. Or, you could just walk around naked, grabbing your genitalia and grunting a lot. In your conversations today, stick to the basics, you know things like killing babies and gang raping Paris Hilton.

Required Listening For Today

(Always important to make the demons think that you are cool like them!)
  1. Black Sabbath - Any of their first six albums.
  2. Iron Maiden - Number Of The Beast
  3. AC/DC - Highway To Hell or Back In Black
  4. King Diamond - No Presents For Christmas EP (Oh' it just tugs at the heart strings!)
  5. Aphrodite's Child - 666 (A personal Prog favorite of mine!)
  6. Necromantic - Black Arts Lead To Everlasting Sins
  7. Rotting Christ -Passage To Arcturo
  8. Grotesque - In The Embrace Of Evil
  9. Blasphemy - Fallen angel Of Doom
  10. Pentagram - Picoroco
Of course, there are other ways to trick the demons, but I wouldn't even recommend these ideas to my worst enemies so you didn't hear them from me. You see, some things are so repulsive, that not even Satan's worst demons can stand them. Like I said though, I strongly do not recommend actually doing any of the following things, but they could very well save your Christian soul as it quakes in fear on this day. Here goes...
  1. Invite all of your friends to join you in front of the TV all day as you have a marathon viewing of the collected works of Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen.
  2. Have a heated philosophical discussion about which doll is more relevant to the meaning of life, Mrs. Beasley from Family Affair or Kitty Carry-All from The Brady Bunch.
  3. Dress all of your friends and yourself up like The Partridge Family. Then, go down to your local park and pretend to give a free concert using a ghetto blaster and fake instruments that you cut out of cardboard and painted yourself.
  4. Metamorphosize your body and mind into Barney or Baby Bop.
  5. Lock yourself in the Disney vault without any drugs.
Suggested Listening For Today

(If you listen to this stuff, then the demons will already think that you are in your own private hell and that there is obviously nothing more that they can do to make you any more miserable then you must already be.)
  1. Barbra Streisand & Barry Gibb - Guilty
  2. Whitney Houston - The Greatest Hits (And anything that she did that wasn't.)
  3. Mariah Carey - Anything that has her picture on the cover.
  4. Toni Braxton - Secrets
  5. Janet Jackson - Thriller - Bad - Dangerous (Oops! I still get those two confused!)
  6. Beyonce' - Dangerously In Love
  7. Christina Aguilera - Anything
  8. Destiney's Child -#1's
  9. Britney Spears - Oops I Did It Again (dropped her baby that is!)
  10. Fantasia - Free Yourself (This one only works for Durban Bud!)
As for me, I will be spending this demonic day all by my self, masturbating while looking at this picture:

S-E-X-YI know, it's the scariest thing known to human kind, isnt it? And, while I am pulling my pud, I will also be listening to the worst song ever written and recorded in the whole entire universe, "What If God Was One Of Us" by Joan Osbourne. Ewww! Even just typing it makes me cringe. I wrote some new lyrics though.

What if God told us all to cuss?
What if God banged a slutty huss?
What if God's pimples popped with puss?

Good luck everyone! Watch out for four guys on horseback, and may Satan be with you.

Sunday, June 04, 2006

An Evening With World's Greatest Bass Player

Tony Levin BandOn Friday night, we went to the Ram's Head Tavern in Annapolis to see the Tony Levin Band. Tony Levin might just be the world's best bass player. Yeah, I know we all have our favorites and could say that about a lot of bass players. Only, in Tony's case, so many people around the world feel the same way as I do, and he is in such constant demand to play on so many people's records that it could just be true. In fact,if you have bought any records at all in the last 30 years, then chances are that you have heard him playing bass somewhere in your collection. Here is a discography if you want to see for yourself. He only started keeping track of his recordings about 10-15 years ago though, and a lot of the recordings have gone out of print. Tony is primarily a session player, but he is also noted for his permanent spot in Peter Gabriel's band and with King Crimson. He is not only a bass player, but he is also known for his work with the Chapman Stick and he plays cello, piano, tuba, sings barbershop quartet, takes a lot of photographs, writes and publishes his own books, paints, and runs his own record company called Papa Bear Records.

Playing Bass
This was the second time for us seeing the band on their current tour for his newest album, "Resonator." The first show was about a month ago at Jaxx in Springfield, Virginia. Then, in a few weeks, we will go up to Bethlehem, Pennsylvania and catch him open up this years NEARFEST which should be a great weekend of Prog Rock for us old geezers. The Tony Levin Band comes pretty much from Peter Gabriel's 70s/early 80's band. The band is made up of drummer Jerry Marotta who has worked with people like Paul McCartney and Suzanne Vega, keyboardist Larry Fast who is known for his Synergy electronic music, keyboardist Pete Levin (Tony's Brother) who is a session player as well and guitarist Jesse Gress who plays in Todd Rundgren's band when he's not driving for The New Cars. With the exception of Larry, all of the band members come from Woodstock, New York.

Funk Fingers

Things You Should Know About Tony Levin:
  1. He is the master of the bottom end.
  2. He worked on the last John Lennon recording sessions.
  3. He is a biker.
  4. He was the co-inventor of Funk Fingers. While working on the Peter Gabriel song "Big Time", Tony and Jerry Marotta came up with a playing style where Tony would finger the notes on the bass neck and Jerry would hit the strings with drumsticks. Since this was a very effective playing style, Tony modified it some and cut a couple of drumsticks in half and velcroed them onto his fingers. After a few more minor modifications, Funk Fingers were born, and Tony manufactured them and sold a bunch on his Website. But, now they are all sold out. Occasionally, you can find them on Ebay for some $$$.
  5. His dog Lilly thinks that he is a god.
  6. He really loves espresso.
  7. He taught me everything I needed to know about hairstyles.

Will the real Tony Levin please stand up...

Here is a set list from the Ram's Head show:

Tony Levin Band Barber Shop Quartet
Pieces Of The Sun
Break It Down
Sabre Dance (A rocking reworking of the classic)
What Would Jimi Do?
Shadow land
Sleepless (King Crimson song)
Beyond My Reach
Places To Go
Crisis Of Faith
Phobos (a TLB version of the Synergy piece)
Back In NYC (the classic Gabriel/Genesis tune)
Fragile As A Song
On The Air (Peter Gabriel song)
Elephant Talk (King Crimson song)
Don’t Give Up - barbershop quartet version (Peter Gabriel song)

Playing Cello

Saturday, June 03, 2006

Do We Really Scare You That Much?

The Truth
The following e-mail came into my e-mail box from the Democratic Party. I felt that it was worth sharing.

Imagine for a moment that you're Republican Bill Frist, the Senate's Majority Leader, and you have the power and awesome responsibility to control what issues the Senate considers and when it considers them. Knowing everything you do about the crises facing our nation and the things that most concern Americans, would your top priority be to:

A) Force the administration to change its failed strategy in Iraq

B) Help consumers walloped by $3.00 a gallon gas and take steps to reduce our oil addiction

C) Pass the first minimum wage increase in 10 years and develop plans to create good jobs in America

D) Expand educational opportunities for college by providing relief from skyrocketing college tuition

E) Ensure access to health care for every American

F) Amend the Constitution to deprive gay people of equal rights under the law

As someone who cares deeply about this nation, its problems and its future, you probably said A, B, C, D, or E. But Republican Majority Leader Frist chose F.

Why? Because it's an election year, and Republicans are in deep trouble. So they've decided that instead of addressing the things Americans really care about, they're trying to change the subject and using wedge issues in hopes of distracting from their failures and dividing Americans to win elections.

This time, LGBT families are the pawns in their political game. And this time, the American Constitution is their political playing field.

Majority Leader Bill Frist plans to bring up the "Federal Marriage Amendment" as the first order of business when Senators return on Monday. And to drive the message home, President Bush will host a Rose Garden event that same day, to reiterate his support for this divisive, unnecessary and diversionary attack on LGBT Americans and on our Constitution-even though his own Vice President opposes the amendment and his own wife says it's wrong to use this issue as a campaign tool.

This is a sad moment in American history. Over two hundred years ago, our nation's founders and framers thought guaranteeing rights and protections was so important that the first ten Constitutional amendments they proposed, which the states soon ratified, were an explicit Bill of Rights for individuals and for states.

Now, in an unprecedented move, Bill Frist and George Bush hope to convert this bedrock document that confers liberties and freedom into one that erases them. They want to deny equal rights under the law because of individuals' sexual orientation-and they want to deny to states avenues that would allow them to recognize and extend equal rights and protections to the LGBT community and their families.

This is shameful and wrong. It hurts LGBT Americans and their families, and it is inconsistent with the constitutional values that set us apart as a nation-and with how we do things in America.

Democrats are committed to equal rights for every American; we oppose discrimination in all their forms. We think it's wrong for the federal government to bar states from extending rights and protections to all their residents. We believe no church, synagogue or mosque should be told by the government whom they may or may not marry. And when it comes to government services and benefits, every citizen and taxpayer should receive equal treatment.

You can show Bill Frist just how wrong he is by signing this petition to stop this divisive amendment and tell him to put the Senate to work on the things that really matter to America and to Americans. Sign on here, and your message will be delivered the day the Senate begins debating the issue:


Republicans have intentionally put divisive, anti-gay initiatives on the ballot in many states as well, and no doubt many nervous GOP Congressmen hope they can get reelected by scapegoating LGBT Americans instead of dealing with the challenges confronting our nation.

But for the first time in our party's history, we are fighting them everywhere. Through our 50-state strategy, we are providing state Democratic parties with needed resources, training and message assistance to fight these measures. At the national level, we are working closely with the leadership of key groups to magnify our capacities. And, around the nation, we are aggressively recruiting volunteers to take a message of equality, tolerance and results on issues that matter into every community.

Sending a powerful message to Bill Frist and George Bush that legislating discrimination defames good people and defiles our Constitution is an important first step in turning our nation around and in beating back efforts at both the federal and state level to scapegoat Americans for partisan gain. But our success depends on you -- so please take part in this action, and learn about what more you can do in the weeks and months ahead:


With hard work and the participation of every American who has had enough, next year we could have a Majority Leader in the U.S. Senate whose answer to our opening quiz looks a lot more like yours.

Thank you,


Brian Bond
Executive Director, GLLC
Democratic National Committee