Bubala, Mumi & Max

Tuesday, January 31, 2006

I've Got Mail... YAY!

Junk!Junk mail is annoying.

I'm talking about snail mail here. The stuff that clutters up the physical mail box, not the one in cyber space. Although, come to think of it, junk e-mail is just as annoying!

Credit card offers, million dollar contests (that somehow I always end up being a finalist in even though I never even entered them), flyers from grocery stores, coupons for free laser hair removal, Chinese food restaurant menus, more credit card offers, mortgage refinance offers, naked man magazines... oh, wait a minute, I subscribed to those. They're not junk mail...

Every now and then, something comes along in the old mailbox that just makes me smile though, even if it is junk mail. That's what happened yesterday when my letter from St. Matthew's Church in Oklahoma arrived.

I could tell without even opening the envelope that this was going to be a good one. On the front of the envelope, it says, "Two Homes Are About To Be Blessed... Then It Must Go To Another Dear Friend. Yours First!"

Then, I turned the envelope over and it got even better. On the back, in a cartoon-ish sort of font it says, "Dear Jesus, We pray that you will bless someone in this home spiritually, physically & financially. And please Dear Lord, Bless the one who’s (sic) hands open this letter. Make good changes in this one’s life and give them the desires of their heart. We pray over and bless this letter in your Holy Name. Amen"

I was so excited! I mean, my home was about to be blessed by Jesus, after all. I had to tear open the envelope and find out what cool things I was going to win from Jesus... Maybe a million dollars, a new sports car, eternal life, a hot new hairy sex slave for me and Mumi... What could it be?

Here is what I found inside the envelope:

My Jesus Wish KitAn 11-by-17 sheet of paper with the face of Jesus on it. It sort of looks like the Shroud of Turin. "Church Prayer Rug" is printed on the paper below Jesus' face. It's a good thing that they labeled it, or I wouldn’t have known it was a prayer rug. Here is what it says on the paper below the image of Jesus: "Look into Jesus’ Eyes you will see they are closed. But as you continue to look you will see His eyes opening and looking back into your eyes. Then go and be alone and kneel on this Rug of Faith or touch it to both knees. Then please check your needs on our letter to you. Please Return this Prayer Rug. Do not keep it."

Wow! This was going to be easy! All I have to do is kneel on the paper rug and wish for stuff? Hell, then let me get started!

On my knees for Jesus...

I got right down on my knees for Jesus and started to pray about the all the cool stuff I wanted. A 42" plasma TV, no wait, make that a 54" plasma TV, a billion dollars, washboard abs, that sex slave that I mentioned earlier. I have to admit that I felt pretty weird kneeling there in front of Jesus. Usually when I get down on my knees, it's to um, well... well, I'm sure you can figure that out for yourself.

So, I finished wishing for all the cool stuff that I wanted and went on to read the letter that was enclosed with the fancy paper rug to see how I was supposed to go about collecting all my free stuff from Jesus. Supposedly, I have to check off the things that I want on a checklist and then mail the letter, the paper Jesus rug and some money back to to the church. Wait a minute... mail money to the church. This is starting to sound like it could possibly be a scam!

I took a look at the things in the checklist that I could wish for: a closer walk with Jesus, my health, to stop a bad habit, a better job, confusion in my home? (Okay, I don't know what that last one is all about either, but it's on the list!) What the fuck?!? Who in the hell wants all these crappy things? I want fancy home electronics, a house on the beach, cars, exotic vacations, hot sweaty man sex. Why isn't any of that stuff on the list?

Oh, hold up, wait a minute. A new car and a money blessing are on the list, so all is not lost! I can just wish for the money. That way, I can just buy all of those other things for myself.

But wait, I have to send money to the church to make my wish for money come true? That's a little redundant, don'tcha think? Maybe this is a scam after all...


There go all my dreams of money, materialistic over-indulgence and hairy naked men! Right down the crapper! What a letdown!

We'll have a gay old time!Oh well! I'll just have to call my good old friends, George W. and Laura Bush. They send me junk mail too, so you know that we are tight! I think I'll ask George if he wants to go see Brokeback Mountain with me again. Maybe that will lift my spirits. Yeah, good 'ol G.W. and Laura If anyone can help me find hot hairy man sex in D.C., it has got to be them... After all, George W. Bush can do anything, right?

Wednesday, January 25, 2006

I do...

I am like, so going to Hell!The last thing I want to do is make this blog a political statement. That being said, I do want to just weigh in on the whole same-sex marriage ban controversy that has come up again recently here in Maryland.

Why are these people who are against same-sex marriage doing this? What are they really afraid of?

Religion keeps on being mentioned as the motivating force in their quest to strip away our rights and privileges. If the only reason that I should not be allowed to be married to my boyfriend is because the Bible (supposedly) says that homosexuality is a sin, then why can thieves, adulterers, murderers, rapists, philanderers and Republicans still get married?

Hell, if the Bible is the ultimate authority on who should and should not be allowed to be married, then we better start fighting for the marriage ban against all of those Marylanders who eat delicious Maryland steamed crabs. According to God, that is an abomination also. (Leviticus 11.10)

Here is an excerpt from a funny letter I found on the 'net. The letter is addressed to George W. Bush, but it's appropriate here as well.

President Bush, I need some advice regarding God's Laws and how best to follow them...

  1. Leviticus 25.44 states that I may possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans but not to Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?

  2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21.7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

  3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanness (Leviticus 15.19-24). The problem is how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.

  4. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord. (Leviticus 1.9) The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

  5. I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35.2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself, or should I ask the police to do it?

  6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination (Leviticus11.10), it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this? Are there degrees of abomination?

  7. Leviticus 21.20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle-room here?

  8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Leviticus 19.27. How should they die?

  9. I know from Leviticus 11.6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean. May I still play football if I wear gloves?

  10. My uncle has a farm. He violates Leviticus 19.19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? (Leviticus 24.10-16) Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair, as we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Leviticus 20.14)

Saturday, January 21, 2006

The Sound Of Silence

I see now that I have been silent on this here blog for over a week now. I guess nothing really exciting has happened to me lately.

Last weekend, I got sick. Some sort of 48 hour intestinal virus thingie. That sucked! I never get sick! Well, hardly ever. Of course it had to happen on the weekend that we had all of our big plans to hang out with the hot, hairy, half-naked men at Blowoff. We still went to Blowoff, but we didn't stay too long since I was feeling like blech! We missed the live set, which was a big disappointment to me. The good thing about Blowoff though, is that it happens every month! So, hopefully, I'll get to see the live stuff next month!

I have been working on some new music which has been occupying a lot of my free time. It's amazing how fast time flies by while I am working on music. I start the day thinking that I am going to get so much done, but end up accomplishing little or nothing at all, even after several hours have passed. My goal is to have at least five songs recorded by the end of February. So far, I have just about finished one song. I've got a long way to go! Here is a rough mix of the first finished song:

The Cold Day (mp3 2.05MB)

We spent one night this past week hanging out with our friends, Tim and Donn. We all had dinner together at the Double T Diner. Our waitress at the Double T was insane! She was an older woman, a Jewish New York native who seemed to know every thing about everything, or at least talked like she did. During our meal, she actually pulled up a chair to our table and just sat and talked and talked (and talked!) Coincidentally, she lives in the same neighborhood that Donn's parents live in, so she went on about living there. She also told us about her life in Manhattan in the 60's, real estate prices, the mob, gambling and who knows what else! I wasn't annoyed by her or anything like that. She was nice enough. In fact, it was really kind of a surreal experience. I almost felt like I was in a sitcom about a wise old Jewish waitress and her gay friends and their zany conversations at the local diner. It was all very entertaining.

After dinner, we headed over to Tim and Donn's place to watch the director's cut of Donnie Darko. This is one of my favorite movies. I had not yet seen the director's cut and it certainly made the movie make so much more sense to me. If you have not seen this movie, you should. It is a science fiction tale that touches on time travel, wormholes and the disruption of time and stuff like that. It is a very intelligent movie that really makes you think when it is over. In fact, we had to go back and rewatch a couple of scenes after it was over just to review, so we could try to figure it all out. You really do have to see it more than once to get the full effect. Also, Jake Gyllenhaal is in the movie, and he is hot...

Ah well, I guess this will have to do for now as I am off to celebrate the fantastic winter weather that we have been having this year. Right now, in the middle of January, it is 59 degrees and sunny! Just beautiful!

Thursday, January 19, 2006

New For 2006

New Music...

Bass Communion

The first new music that I am listening to in 2006 is the new Bass Communion album entitled, "Loss." Bass Communion is one of the side projects of Porcupine Tree’s Steven Wilson. It is his venture into the world of ambient music. This is the kind of music to put on while you’re doing something else. Whereas some ambient music comes across as kind of bland and new agey, this guy’s stuff is a little more spacey. With this new release and the last BC album called "Ghosts on Magnetic Tape," the mood is actually kind of spooky. This isn’t the kind of music to play when you’re alone in the house at night. It will creep you out.

Dead Children... Scary...The album is on vinyl in a limited edition of 450 copies. (I got #79.) It is packed in a pink, scented, silky sleeve. It has a matching booklet of antique photos of children, dead in their coffins, and other macabre images. The record has two side long eerie pieces of music. The first side sounds like music for old funeral parlors and the other side sounds like music for creepy old attics. Just the kind of happy sounds to cheer you out of your winter blues. Only, I think that all of the copies of this record are sold out now.

New Concert...

So, we went down to the Black Cat Club Sunday night to check out the return of Craig Wedren to the DC area. He hasn’t played here since the summer of 1998. After that, Shudder To Think broke up as they got more into doing film soundtracks and theme music, and less into wanting to be a rock band. So, Craig moved to New York City where he has been very busy doing other things. You know the theme for Reno 911, that’s his. He also has a new band called BABY. And, last year, he put out his first solo record, "Lapland," which is just incredible.

So, he and fellow Baby band member, Amy Miles, who also has her own record, set off on a short tour with the last stop happening in DC. It was sort of a homecoming for Craig, Shudder To Think used to play the Black Cat, sometimes 5 or 6 times a year (I was always there) when they were a local band. This time, there were only about 60 or 70 people there, but it was one of those special shows for Craig and for me. He played most of the new record and even a few Shudder tunes. This man can coo like a dove and he is really very sexy. And, he is a really nice guy as well.

Craig is so dreamy...

After the show, he told me that he was so happy to look out and see me there. I was so touched that he remembered my face after almost 8 years. He said he would hopefully be playing out more. He also made a comment about my sweats, and he said his father would have had me out on the porch doing calisthenics. (I’m up for it!) Jason thinks he was checking me out. Craig has a girlfriend, and she was there, but he acts like he’s comfortable with the feminine side of his personality He is certainly comfortable around gay guys.

The man is just so gifted.

She Don’t Sleep
Alone In Love
Wanna Drive?
Red House
Do You Harm
Rain Diamonds
Hit Liquor
Fifteen Minutes Late
Born Curious
X - French T-Shirt
Fall In
Night Is Over
Day Ditty
Happy Birthday

One Man’s Heart



Are We Not Men?


Tuesday, January 17, 2006

If Love Isn't Forever, Then Hand Me My Leather


Well, actually, I never got too much into the leather scene. It’s not that I’m real vanilla, or that my looks and body wouldn’t work out on display, or that I don’t feel manly enough. We all know that isn’t much of a qualification anymore.

All you really need is:

  1. Some money. The leather stuff doesn’t grow on trees, and if you want it tailored to fit you, it costs.
  2. It helps to be somewhat in shape. A few trips to the gym, and you’ll be fine.
  3. A little facial fuzz can help, but it’s not required.
  4. Read the leatherman’s handbook on the do’s and don’ts, so you don’t make a complete asshole out of yourself or get yourself into something that is way over your head.
  5. A motorcycle is sure to get you laid, but just as many of the others will come in their cars.
  6. It helps to have the right attitude. (Not the Bette Davis kind.)
  7. I’ll pat you on the back, and say, "Go get ‘em tiger!" as you walk out the door.

I guess it’s more a matter of comfort for me. I’m more of a sweats and a t-shirt kind of guy, real laid back. I hate dressing up at all for anything. I also feel like I look like a dork in leather (see below), and I think a lot of other people also look kind of dorky all decked out. Not all of them, but some of them. Let’s face it though, it’s kind of like high school within our community where you have to wear the right kind of clothes to be able to fit in with the cool crowd, and I’m too much of a nonconformist to try to live up to that bullshit. Also, when everyone dresses the same, there are no individuals left. If you’re a biker, however, it’s almost necessary that you wear leather. It’s like a second skin of protection against the elements. Too bad when gay men wear it, it never seems to protect us wear we need it the most.

Oh God, Could It Be The Weather?

I always see those few guys every gay pride day when it’s like 80 or 90 degrees outside and they are all decked out in a full leather uniform. Is this a cruel initiation ritual? A dietary technique? Are they really that dumb or really that vain? I just want to give them a pair of sweat shorts and say “Dude go change, then grab some sun rays on your underexposed white body.” To me, the gay leather scene always comes across as a little too glamorous. I like those blue collar guys, the low maintenance ones that don’t need or can’t afford all the costumes to feel comfortable and are not trying to draw attention to themselves.

You Can Take A Lot Of Abuse If You Exchange Your Skin For Leather

Another reason I think I didn’t get into the whole leather thing is because soon after I came out, I got involved with a gay youth group at the gay community center in Washington, DC. There was this guy there named Mike who was about 19 and I was 16. He was cute enough, but no facial fuzz, so I never went after him. He was looking for a daddy anyway. So, we just hung out in the group and went to some shows together. Then, as we all got a little older, he started hanging out at leather bars more and more with a much older crowd and stopped coming to the youth group. We would run into him occasionally. One time, we saw him, and he was like "Man I got into this real intense scene last night" and he lifted up his shirt to show us where some guy he had picked up had whipped his back and there were all these welt marks there. I saw him out and about a few times after that. He just started to look more and more haggard as his leather attire became more complete and he collected a string of sadistic fucks. Mike was also one of the first from the youth group members to get HIV. He hung out around DC for awhile, then he split for Oregon and passed in 89 or 90.

Note to self: Don’t be this guy.

Look, I'm Standing Naked Before You

So, I was seeing this guy Lonnie (pre Jason) who turned into more of a stoner, JO bud than a boyfriend. He introduced me to this fuck buddy of his named Ford. Now, Ford was really networked into the FFA scene. He knew it wasn’t my thing, but Ford and I hit it off as friends. We’d get stoned and talk about art and Dali and I’d turn him on to music he’d never heard before. I made him a Rollins Band mix tape and told him to play it during his next FF session. He did and said it worked, but he was to preoccupied to flip the tape over. One night, Ford and Lonnie and I were hanging out getting high and they were like, "Hey, let’s dress Steve up in leather." I’m like. "Yeah, whatever." Next thing I know, I have chaps on over my jeans, boots, a vest and cap and Ford’s taking pictures and saying, "Steve, pull out your dick" and I‘m feeling like I’m trying out to be a Village People replacement. Really, I guess I was feeling more like that kid from the Christmas Story movie, the one in the bunny suit. What a dork, can I take it off now? Then, Ford stuffs a red hankie in my pocket and says now we can all go out and look for some fist fucking action.

Note to Ford: I don’t think so!
(Lonnie and Ford - R.I.P.)


So, let’s take a look at some of the leather icons who have inspired the leather folk throughout the years:

Rebel Without An AshtrayJames Dean - "The Rebel Without A Cause" He blew his mind (and body) out in a car. He didn’t notice that he had become an ashtray. Literally, man, the guy liked it when you put cigarettes out on him. (Ouch!)

Violet! You're turning Violet!Marlon Brando - "The Wild One" (Or, the fat one!) I heard that they revoked his leather license years before the Oompa Loompas rolled him up to the dejuicing room. Sorry it didn’t work out.

Aaayyyyy!The Fonz - "AAAAAAAYYYYY! Sit On It" Who can hate this guy? He gave his leather jacket to the Smithsonian. You can go and see it there.

Y, M, C, Gay!Glenn Hughes - Do you think you’d ever run into him in a YMCA? Have you ever been to a YMCA? There are kids running around taking karate lessons and swimming. Not a real ideal place to have a leatherman fuckfest. Besides, he died of cancer in 1991at age 51.

I knew he was, didn't you?Rob Halford - "Hell Bent For Leather"
This guy is more my speed. I don’t know why the gay leather community hasn’t started worshipping this guy as a god. (Not that I do or would.) It’s probably because a lot of his fans called guys like him faggots and kicked their asses in high school. But, hey, the jokes on them now that Rob is out. If Judas Priest ever played MAL, I would go in a second. A sweaty, gay, leather, metal mosh pit would separate the men from the boys. (I‘m in on this one.)

Classic, good porn funTom Of Finland - Here’s the really guilty guy. Yeah, his pictures have been inspiring guys to become one of "Tom’s Men" for years. His drawings always over-exaggerate and create a fantasy world in which gay men are always happy and having fun even if they don‘t always look like it. And, if you don’t get a boner looking at his work, just rub it a few times to get it started. His career spanned over 40 years and shows the whole evolution of a gay subculture. He died in 1991 at age 71. His legacy will live on as long as guys keep putting on the leather and getting frisky with each other.

Go get em’ tiger!

Okay, Who'd I forget?

Thursday, January 12, 2006


This glass is all empty...I don't generally view the glass as half full or half empty. In fact, most of the time, I am just pissed that someone drank half of whatever was in my glass in the first place. I guess that I am a moderate when it comes to the whole optimism versus pessimism debate.

On the one hand, I am smart enough to know that, in general, this world really sucks. Living here can be very trying at times. Hell, it can be downright depressing sometimes. It can be sad enough to make me just want to curl up under the covers into the fetal position and cry for the whole day. Oh, and by the way, there is absolutely nothing wrong with that, crying that is.

On the other hand, I am also smart enough to know that, at the same time, there is at least a little bit of beauty in just about everything that I see. Even in the ugliest places, there is still probably at least a little bit of something beautiful hiding out in there somewhere. Maybe a flower grows in the middle of a pile of putrid, rotting garbage tossed carelessly onto the side of the road. Maybe there is a stunning sunset in the background somewhere out past those cancer-causing, pollution-puffing smokestacks over there on the horizon. Why, there is even a pretty rainbow swirling around in the oily slicked rain puddle out there on the street. Beauty is everywhere, if you know where to look for it.

Pretty Puddle

You might be wondering by now just where this particular rant is leading to. Well, here is the answer. I finally saw Brokeback Mountain the other night, and it wasn't quite what I had expected it to be. You see, I had read in reviews and on other blogs that this movie was so, so sad and that if I didn't cry at the end, then I must obviously be some sort of homophobic, bigoted, unfeeling, scary gay monster. Well, I didn't cry at the end of the movie.

The reason that I did not cry at the end of this movie is not becuase the movie is bad or not because the performances are subpar or anything like that. And, it is not becasue the story is lame either. It isn't. It is a great and powerful movie with a beautifully told story of love and regret filled with praiseworthy performaces by everyone involved. The reason that I did not cry at the end of the movie is not because I an emotionless, self loathing monster man either. In fact, I do cry sometimes. Every now and then, I even cry at the end of a movie.

I guess the reason that I did not cry at the end of Brokeback Mountain is becuase seeing the movie was actually an uplifting experience for me. It reminded me of how lucky I am in my life and in my relationship. I have never had to hide who I am from anyone. There have been virtually no negative repercussions from my coming out. I can walk proudly alongside my man everywhere that we go together, and I don't have to suffer the same slings and arrows that so many others before us (and some still do) suffer. I have been so fortunate, and I am so thankful for that.

Of course, I know that not everyone in the world has been as lucky as I have. There are a lot of people out there still, even in this day and age, who suffer torment, rejection and ridicule just for being who they are. Obviously, this is not news to anyone in our community. We all know someone, possibly even ourselves, that has been made fun of, knocked down, made small or even worse, and that hurts. In fact, sometimes, it can hurt so much that we can very easily forget that there is still some beauty left in this world.

I can only hope that no matter whatever happens to me, or to you, or to anyone else that is near and dear to any of us, or whatever happens to anyone out there who is just like us, that all of us will never forget that life is short. Life is way too short. We can very easily choose to spend that little bit of time that we have together cursing all of the ugliness around us. Or, we can open our eyes just a little bit wider, just enough to see past the ugly. That way, hopefully, we won't forget to notice the beauty that waits there for all of us. Beauty waiting patiently to be discovered by tired and weary eyes. Beauty waiting to remind us that we are not ugly. Beauty there to reassure us that we are not alone as long as we have something precious to behold.


Wednesday, January 11, 2006

Give Me A Head With Hair

When I was 16, my hair began to fall out. Just a little bit at first. You know, you start to see it clogging up the drain while you’re in the shower. Then, you start to notice a slightly receding hairline. It’s something that happens to most middle-aged guys. Only, it started with me when I was just a teenager. (Fortunately for me, it only hurt my chances of getting laid slightly.)

The reasons for my premature hair loss are still up for discussion. Some possibilities are:

  1. One of my biological parents was an alien who came down from Alien World and screwed an ape in the jungles of Washington, D.C., possibly the Black Forest. Then, both of my biological parents left me on Earth to be raised by human beings which was just too much for me and my hair to take. Yes, of course both of my biological parents were males. What kind of sick monkey do you think I am?

  2. I grew my hair really long in the late 70’s and very early 80’s. It was all the way down to my nipples. Gradually, I kept cutting it shorter and shorter. When I came out in 1982, I cut it really short, since my boyfriend at the time liked it that way. So, naturally, after all that hair cutting, my hair just decided to keep on growing shorter and shorter all by itself, and it continued to recede.

  3. The stress of being a young gay monkey in the Reagan era was very depressing. So, in 1983, they put me on an early form of the anti-depressant called Tofranil. I was always way ahead of my peers as far as drug experimentation was concerned. In this case, however, the pills were actually prescribed to me. Shortly after starting on this drug, my hair started falling out.

  4. The last theory is that as more and more hair appeared all over the rest of my body throughout my pubescent years, my young monkeyhood years, and the "knocking on the door of a midlife crisis" years, less and less hair has grown up there on the top of my head. It’s almost as if there are these little hair elves who come along at night while I am sleeping and shave all of the hair off of my head and glue it everywhere else on my body. And, trust me, I do mean everywhere else on my body.

DaliAnyways, let's skip right on up to the early 1990’s. To a time when I knew who Fugazi was, but I don’t think Nirvana had gotten really big yet. It was at that time, that I just got tired of looking half-haired. I took what I later referred to as "The Plunge" and shaved my head completely bald. I was inspired to do so by one of the sexiest and best bass players in the world, Tony Levin. Now, keep in mind, that I did this back in the days before everyone else dove in to the hairless look. Also at that time, I was sporting a long Salvador Dali’esque handlebar moustache waxed to a sharp point that came up to just under the corners of each eye. People would come up to me and say, “Are you some kind of Nazi skinhead, or what?”

Now, on to present day. Last November, I decided to grow a beard to keep warm for the winter months. I thought that the beard looked kind of weird with my head being bald and all, so I decided to grow my hair back. Well, at least the parts of my hair that would actually grow back. It’s been growing more and more ever since then. I had completely forgotten about some of the small things that come along with having hair, like the wind blowing through it, or that it gets dirty and that you need to shampoo it. I must admit that I do like the feeling of running my hands through it. It reminds me of what it feels like making out with a guy that has hair. (Like Bubala, for example.)

Mumi The ClownNow comes the hard part of my story. My hair is getting a little too long for me. I’m starting to feel like Bozo The Clown. So, I had Bubala make hair cut appointments for the both of us. I haven’t had to have a haircut in over 15 years. I almost feel like it will be a big rip off since I’m just going to shave it all off when the weather warms up anyway. For now though, I guess I do need to get it trimmed. I won’t touch the beard, however, because I think that Bubala is liking my beard for certain reasons. Maybe, when I get to the barber shop, I should throw a big temper tantrum just before I sit down in the chair like I used to when I was a little monkey. That way, they’ll give me a lollipop or something. Then again, maybe the lollipops and all that other sweet stuff are Bubala’s responsibility now...

Tuesday, January 10, 2006

Artsy Tuesday, A Photo & A Poem

Here is a photo:

Nude, Next To A Wall
Nude, Next To A Wall

and, here is a poem:


you must think I am such a fool
i cannot even look at you
my mind is blind save for your smile
i do not understand it
for so long I felt no love
and then it washes down on me
consuming me
it comforts me
what is beauty that you hide
where is that emotion
is it physical or only thinking
i have never loved another
like the living we have done
every terrible day
and you are there for me
only as far as you allow
must be good enough for me
still i question how we carry on
i could not be so very worse
and yet you smile
i almost cry
i wonder if you like this
you must know i am such a fool
i cannot look away
there is so much there
you are a vision
a stunning example of everything i love
so gentle and full of passion
always shining
i wonder what it must be like
to really love you

Wednesday, January 04, 2006

Happy New What?

2006, huh?

Yep, it really is!I still have not quite been able to absorb the fact that another year has passed, and it is now 2006. This past holiday season flew by. Seems like we just put up the Christmas tree last week, and now it's January? I guess time really does fly when you're having sex... er, I mean FUN! ...yeah, fun, that's it!

2006 was a pretty good year. Not the best ever, but certainly not the worst. We made some great new friends. We also started this here blog and met even more great people. And, we went to our very first Blowoff on December 5th and met even more great people! That is something that we have not done in many years, meet new people that is. It was nice to get back out into the world and circulate a bit. Hopefully, we will meet even more great people in 2006.

I got my cool new keyboard this past year also. I have not been able to play with it as much as I would like to, what with the holidaze and all. I plan to really get going with it in 2006. I did manage to record one song. It is a cover of my absolutely favorite song by this guy. I recorded it to get some experience using the new keyboard. It actually turned out okay though, so I'll share it with you as long as you promise not to laugh! At least until the lawyers call and tell me to cease and desist that is... :')

New #1 (MP3 4.09 MB)*

*MP3's are offered for evaluative purposes only. They are not for sale or for resale.

Sunday, January 01, 2006

All Is Noisy On New Year's Day

So Long 2005...Okay, so here is a list of the music that I was/am listening to from 2005. I don’t like to rank or chart music because different times and experiences throughout life call for different music. So, nothing is really ever the best, only the best for right now. Then, it all gets shelved away as the next year’s music comes into rotation.

So, without further ado, here is the list at random:

Kate Bush - Aeriel - This is the first offering from Kate in 12 years. I have to wonder how do you support yourself without working for so long? The laziness aside, this was a great record from Kate, and it’s great to have her back in action. We missed you, Kate.

Adrian Belew - Side One/Side Two - This is actually two releases from one of the King Crimson guitarists while the band is in sleep mode. This dual release demonstrates Mr. Belew’s great song writting skill and his experimental ventures. Side Three and side Four coming in 2006.

The Mars Volta - Frances The Mute - These guys are wild. It’s definitely an acquired taste, a mix of free form jazz/rock/latin/psychedelic. It’s amazing to me that in 2005, records like this are being made. They also released a live record called Scab Dates this past year which is pretty good as well.

Madonna - Confessions On A Dance Floor - Cool electro dance music. Great production. A lot of borrowed things and some of the worst lyrics EVER. If Mommy Dearest is gonna have her daughter write lyrics for her, then at least give the little girl some credit. Every time I hear “I love New York,” it makes me feel like a dork.

Sigur Ros - Takk - More rocky than their last fantastic album ( ). This is a nice sounding record from this band from the land of Bjork.

Porcupine Tree - Deadwing - Okay, maybe I do have a few favorites. I’ve been following this band for about 10 years now. I’m convinced that Steven Wilson is pure genius.

Bob Mould - Body Of Song - This is probably the best Bob Mould solo album ever. Make sure that you get the deluxe edition or "side 3 and the remixes" as I like to call it. Bob rides a rocking horse through most of this CD with a touch of his electronic explorations on the left side and his folky/acoustic stuff on the right.

Craig Wedren - Lapland - This is the first solo album from the ex-Shudder To Think vocalist/guitarist. Even though the wait was long, it was worth it. Beautiful songs jammed with a lot of emotion from by far one of my favorite vocalists ever. Sometimes, I hear the guy, and I just want to cry it touches me so. And, he’s kinda sexy too. Why he didn’t become some sort of rock god in the 90’s is beyond me.

System Of A Down - Mezmerize/Hypnotize - Two releases from these guys. This is good boner music. I mean, I really think their drummer, John Dolmayan, is a hot fucker, and I like to watch and hear him beat off.

Tori Amos - The Beekeeper - Ahh Tori... This isn’t the best album from her, but it’s not the worst either. It has some good songs on it. I kind of miss the days when there were 12 songs on her albums, and you had to find the other 8 as b-sides. Now, her albums seem to play a little longer and aren’t quite as cohesive because there are so many different songs to try to tie them into a running theme. This aside, Tori is still brilliant, and it’s not her fault that she writes so many songs and the industry just isn’t doing the singles with b-sides thing anymore. She is much more in her element when performing live where she is truly free.

Djam Karet - Recollection Harvest - Another brilliant album from one of my only favorite American prog rock bands. They are all instrumental, so there are no words to absorb, just soundscapes. Some of them are more rocking, whereas others are more acoustic or ambient in nature. This band always tries to explore the hour that their CD releases stretch. I first found out about after hearing them on a compilation of musical interpretations of Salvador Dali’ paintings.

Rush - R-30 - Do live albums count? Only if they’re from Rush and only if the other performers on this list all huddle together and cower in fear of this mighty (old) roar that comes down from the Great White North and blows us all away. I only hope I can still rock like that when I’m in my 50's.

About New Year's Resolutions...

A friend once asked me what I was going to give up for New Year’s. I told her hope. For the most part, I have never felt the need to give up anything for New Year’s. Perhaps, however, there are things that I don’t do now that I should. Instead of taking something away, maybe I should add something. It just seems more positive that way to me. This year, I think I want to become more outgoing. I also think I should drink more. Hey, maybe these two could work together.

One thing is for sure:

There's (an) old man on a warm and sunny island.
No job, no money, just a smile to call his own.
Know what he says? "The past will only haunt you.
Live for today. Each day's an open door."